Plastic Jesus

Trad.; Arr. and some words by Phil Heggie

Well, I don't care if it rains or freezes
Long as I have my plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car

Through all trials and tribulations
We will travel every nation
With my plastic Jesus I'll go far

Plastic Jesus, plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Through all trials and tribulations

We will travel every nation
With my plastic Jesus I'll go far

Riding down a thoroughfare
With his nose stuck in the air
A wreck may be ahead, but He don't mind

Trouble coming He don't see
He just keeps His eye on me
And any other looney From behind

Plastic Jesus, Plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Though the sunshines on his back

Makes Him peel, chip and crack
A little Boss-stick Blu-Tac fills His scars

When pedestrians try to cross
I let them know who's the boss

I never blow my horn so they ain't warned
I ride all over town
Trying to run them bastards down

And It's seldom they live to see the morn'.

Plastic Jesus, plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
His haloed cross sits right

And I use it for a sight
And they'll scatter or splatter near and far

If I weave around at night
And the police think I'm tight
They'll never find my bottle, though they ask

Plastic Jesus shelters me
For His head comes off, you see
He's hollow, and I use Him for a flask

Plastic Jesus, plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Ride with me and have a dram

Of the blood of the Holy Lamb
Plastic Jesus doubles as my bar

Plastic Jesus, plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car

Once His robe was snowy white
Now it isn't quite so bright
Stained by holey smoke of my cigar

Plastic Jesus, plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
But I think he'll have to go

His magnet's ruined my radio
All my cassettes wiped clean as my bar

Soft karaoke
Words
Bass    (BB)
Drums   (BB)
Piano   (BB)
Guitar  (BB)
Strings (BB) (none)
Melody  (BB)
Melody  (BB)